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1. One must keep in mind that a basic understanding— that pictorial representation of a figure, object or person need not be the only criteria for a beautiful work of art. In other words, the exact copying of an object or person need not be the essential evidence for a perfect masterpiece.
2. Remember that your child has no intention of creating
a picture in the same sense as you, an adult. Keep V in mind too, that he is drawing or painting as a natural self expression because to him it is primarily FUN.
3. Try to remember that a child maintains his particular style or characteristics throughout his work. For example, he may base most of his drawings with a peculiar circle shape that is inscribed with a dot or a dash, even a cross. This may appear again in a flower, a button, a handle or as a basic design. This is the development of STYLE. Thus it is equally important to save your child's drawings and to review them from time to time. Keep a scrap book of his work.
4. Draw or paint together with your child. Keep it special on a rainy day. You need not be an expert. It need not be expensive. Just use pencil and paper or if you have a pentel pen it's even better.
5. To appreciate your child's art work, one must see with the eyes of a child. Then one will learn from his child. He can express many creative and spontaneous ideas from his own world of imagination, creativity and fantasy.
6. Finally, let your child talk about his work. A treasury of ideas, thoughts and feelings will emerge that will help you to understand your child's art and that will help you to know him better.
Encourage him!
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1. Have a quiet, unemotional "conference" with both parents and grandparents, if they are being together. Consolidate your forces and try to see the problem from an objective point of view.
Make them understand that the problem is not yet serious, but it could develop into real delinquency if not attended to right away. Blaming you or giving excuses will not help. Your task is to help the boy shake off the habit.
2. Accept the possibility that the boy may be unhappy or perplexed about Ids life. There are conflicts existing around him. He is not insulated against them. He feels these as acutely as you do.
3. The ideal arrangement would be for you to share the same roof with them — without the grandparents. But if this is not possible, you just try to make yourself more available to the kids and to spend more time with them. Take them out for the day shopping, going to the movies, taking in a show, so that they will get to know you better.
4. Don't punish or scold your son for pilfering. Wide experience has shown that severe punishment or even strong disapproval does not necessarily stop a child from committing the same acts. Make him know that what he has done is wrong but you know that in time he will learn to do right.
5. Return the objects he has taken to their owner. If it is easier for you to go along, you would be wise to do so. He will learn that one does not take or keep things belonging to others and his mother is willing to go with him to return the article. This act on your part will assure him that he still belongs among those who are good and fovable, and that he is not doomed to becoming a thief.
6. Stealing or pilfering may also be caused by feelings of inadequacy. A boy or girl who steals is sometimes having trouble making friends and is trying to get attention or by popularity. He needs help in overcoming this feeling, in having some experience of success or recognition, specially from his parents.
7. It is not easy to discover the source of the child's un-happiness, but if you are agreeable, you could, seek the help of a professional guidance counselor who has had experience with many children.
In general, although the precise set of causes that lead to a child's stealing may not be known, it often happens that with more attention and expressed affection from his parents, more shared recreation or useful work with them, perhaps the development of a hobby or collection or other interests, his need to steal tapers off and stops by itself.
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1. See that your child has periodic physical examinations to learn whether he has health problems that might interfere with top performance in school.
2. If your child is upset because a friend gets better marks than he does, let him know that someone else's marks are less important than the fact that he himself is trying to bring up his grades. Also, point out to him the things that he does very well.
3. See that a child has a place where he can study quietly without the distraction of television or siblings.
4. Help a child organize his day so that he has time for play, hobbies, and homework.
5. If you have a beef about your child's teachers, take it up with the teacher. Criticizing the school in a child's presence only hurts the child's attitude toward learning.
6. Find ways for a child to use at home what he learns in school. Let him double-check your grocery tape to see if it adds up correctly. Give a teenager the job of checking your bank statements against canceled checks.
7. At the dinner table, guide children into a "bull session" on serious topics, and do as much listening as talking.
8. Take some adult education courses. How can you give your child better proof that education is important?
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1. A regular allowance, no matter how small, helps give a child a sense of independence and responsibility. He learns how money can be used to buy things he needs or wants.
2. Unless the child has chance to spend his money himself, in any way he wants, he will not have the real learning experience, so don't tell him how to spend his money or to scold him when you find out he has spent it foolishly.
3. Do not give him more money when he runs short of it so that he will learn to limit his expenditures or to make choices. If he needs to have money badly, give him some but consider it an advance to be deducted from his next allowance.
4. Your child's allowance should be enough to cover all his needs, plus a little extra for emergency use or savings. Until he learns how to make both ends meet or to make it last till the next allowance, it is better to give the money on a daily basis. Most mothers give children a daily allowance while they are in the grades, a weekly allowance when they reach high school. And depends on a child's ability to manage his money.
5. Don't use money emotionally; that is, giving money as a reward for good behavior or withdrawing or reducing his allowance as punishment for misconduct. An allowance is given because it is needed, not according to parental whims.
6. Do not allow your child to get caught up in "keeping with the Joneses" pattern at his impressionistic age. When he complains that his classmates or friends have bigger allowances or more money to spend, the best answer or explanation you can give is because his friends' parents are richer or more indulgent.
7. Encourage your children to earn. The money a child earns on his own is money he value most. Earning does not mean asking for payment for doing household chores they should perform in their contribution for keeping the house clean and tidy and in good shape. However, parents should pay their children for doing task or jobs that they pay outsiders to do, especially when these jobs require extra effort or interfere with the children's normal activities.
8. Get your children to share in money decisions. When something expensive is to be bought, consult the children, discussing with them the pros and cons of such a purchase. When a money problem arises in the family, let the children offer suggestions for solving it.
No child is too young to be told by his parents why they cannot give him the money he asks for or why they cannot or should not buy the expensive toy he wants just because one of his playmates has one and is showing it off.
But the most important factor in the training of a child in the management of money is the example set by his parents, their attitude towards money shown in various ways in their daily life
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If you feel you have one in your family, here are a few important guidelines you might follow:
1. Listen to what teachers tell you about him. They can usually be more objective than you are.
2. Try to face the fact that he really is slower thaftr his classmates and his brothers and sisters.
3. Recognize that he is not headed for a successful college career.
4. Realize that being either overly indulgent or hostile toward him won't eliminate his limitations.
5. Feel good about his achievements; put an accent on his assets.
6. Try to understand that his need for guidance, planning, and your support and stimulation is the same as your other children require — but perhaps earlier and more.
7. Keep in mind that the "cold world" is one he too will have to live in, so sheltering him won't pay off.
8. Remember that the major goal of parenthood is cutting the "silver cord" that binds our children to us. Self-sufficiency is especially important for him.
9. Recognize that how and what he learns may be different from the rate, manner and content of others, so more repetition, demonstration and particularly patience may be needed.
10. Support any school efforts to get away from competitive graded report cards that so often leave slow learners with the feeling they can't do anything right.
If you can bring yourself to recognize how much he is able to accomplish, give him credit for what he does well, and cooperate closely with his school to set up a program appropriate to his needs, you can help reduce the possible stigma of being an "island child."
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1. Space the children's birth. Anything less three years apart means trouble for the older child because the mother must devote most of her attention to the younger child, and it's the mother who contributes most to a child's early development.
2. Let the children explore. When a child is seven months old, make the home absolutely safe and turn him loose to explore. This enables the child to make discoveries and encourages the child to learn.
3. Keep toys available. Educational toys help child learn and keep him from getting too bored.
4. Respond to trouble or frustration. When your child is frustrated or has a problem, he will go to you for help. Be quick to respond and identify with what he is interested in rather than trying to focus his interest on what you want him to learn.
5. Relate words to objects. For example, if your child shows you a ball, ask him to 'roll the ball' to you and demonstrate. Such games help expand a child's vocabulary.
6. Do not rely on TV as a baby-sitter. Maintain a personal relationship with your child. A mother should spend at least half of her child's waking hours with him — not hovering over him, but on hand and showing him an interest in what he is doing.
7. Don't cage your child in a playpen. A child bores quickly and nothing is more boring than long periods of playpen confinement.
8. Learn to say 'no.' Be alert to curb your child's natural mischief-making tendencies. Set realistic limits on his behavior and stick to them.
9. Don't force toilet training too early. It will create a gap between you. By the age of two, most children are ready to accept toilet training as a lesson rather than punishment.
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